Hey guys! I have been trying to figure out what to post and God laid it on my heart to post about how He reminded of his goodness a few days ago.
A few days ago, I was driving to work and listening to music like I always do. A song called Fix Me by Icon For Hire came on. The chorus of the song says “why cant you fix me? I can’t help myself.”
Y’all this is exactly how I’ve been feeling lately with my tourettes and everything else. I’ve been really done because I feel like every time I get 2 steps forward, I take 3 steps back. Its been super rough.
But then a new song came on. It was Run To You by Lacey Sturm. This song is about the prodigal son and how God will literally run to you if you come back to him.
Y’all, my heart was wrecked. I was driving trying not to cry. That’s when I really realized that I haven’t been as close to God as I have been in the past. I haven’t been to church in a while. I haven’t been reading my bible lately. I sometimes remember to pray. I was in pieces.
I have been struggling with who I am, what my purpose is, why I have what I have. Questions like why did you give me this or why haven’t you heal this person have been floating in my head.
I can surely tell you that I absolutely love God and that he can and will wreck my heart now and then reminding me that He is still there. It’s hard when you go through a severe depression for no reason and everything gets hard. Yes it has gotten better since then but my life is nowhere near where it used to be.
Life isn’t always going to be roses and sunflowers. Flowers to fade but the one thing that won’t is God. He will absolutely always be there. He will be there for you when you come back after not being with Him. He will run to you when you call His name.
I didn’t want to post this. And I still really don’t but trusting God is more important then being in my comfort zone.
Maybe you are struggling today with questions like “why haven’t You fixed me.” Believe me I completely understand where you are at. I was literally there days ago. Sometimes the reason that God doesn’t fix us or allow us to be healed is so that we can use whatever it is for His glory. And while yes it can be hard to get to that point, it is possible. Become an advocate for God. Remind others just like you that God is there and that He is good. Because He is!
Madison Rae <3
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